It doesn’t matter how much of an analytical, number-crunching, Sheldon Cooper-type person you may be, emotion is a big part of any real estate transaction. Emotion is a funny thing. It can guide you in the right direction. It may give you that unquantifiable sense that leads you to think that this is the home you can be happy in. It can give you that gut feeling that this property in this neighbourhood is a smart investment. It’s something you can just feel in your bones. It’s something you’re brain can’t do on its own. Of course, emotions can make a mess out of us too. It can produce enough anxiety to make you second guess every detail along the way. And if that crazy emotion comes calling, you just need to know that it’s just emotion that’s taking you over. Just like the Bee Gees had said it.

With that said, I am not going to suggest that I could be a kind of real estate therapist for anyone. And I certainly cannot say how each person will react emotionally when making one of the biggest financial decisions of their lives. Still, I have been doing this real estate selling and buying for a number of years, and I do see patterns that emerge.

I believe the key to these big real estate transactions is to be aware that emotions will take place during times when big decisions need to be made.So I say: Make emotion your friend! You don’t have to push down and deny that it’s brewing up inside you, and you don’t have to uncan it and let it run wild and unedited either.

You just have to acknowledge that it’s there. The key is to understand your emotion in a real estate transaction is to simply be aware of it while it is happening. Don’t let it overtake you, but just observe why it would pop up during your real estate process.

If you’re a first time buyer, I think emotions are even stronger since they are being brought up by the real estate process for the first time, and you may not feel you have control or a complete understanding of the process. You are going to jump off a cliff and not know where you will land. Emotion will want to be around for that. For the most part, if you can afford your property and like where you live, your experience on the buy side of things will likely follow a pattern like this:

1. BEFORE THE BUY  Before buying your house or condo, you will have a certain anxiety around large numbers coming up to the purchase of your property. After all, you’re not just buying a bike here. For the most party, however, you feel excitement. If you are in a situation where you must compete for a property, you may worry that you will not be successful in buying your home. You may be in competition and lose it. If you are negotiation one on one, you may be concerned that a deal cannot be reached. Often, you will dream about yourself in the property you want. You may lie in bed at night designing your house. You may research what park or doggie daycare to take your dog,or research what schools would best suit your kids. It may be as simple as imagining yourself in the house. There’s nothing wrong with any of this, but you just have to keep in mind, that the home is not yours until you have the keys in your hand.
2. DURING NEGOTIATION OR OFFER NIGHT  This is an emotional apex here. Emotions will run wild and free. And who could blame them? So, you should acknowledge they are there, and prepare in advance for their big arrival. Know your financial limits in advance and how far you are willing to go that is affordable to you to obtain your home. Also, it may be wise to anticipate certain situations. If, for example, you are putting in an offer on a property that is holding back offers for a certain night, you may want to ask yourself what kind of offer you will give the seller if you are the only offer on offer night or if you are one of two offers or even one of ten offers. Anticipate what may come, and you will not have to make big decisions when the emotional part of you is maxing out. THE BUY – Once you buy it, the very moment you receive the news you will be met with excitement and relief, but there will likely be a small part of you that panics. If you were in a bidding war, you will wonder if you paid too much. If you were in a one-on-one negotiation, you will wonder if you have worked out the best deal. Over the next 24 hours, you will have moments where you are very pleased with yourself that you’ve purchased the property you want mixed with feelings that you may have made a horrible decision. Hold tight here. Emotions will try to jar you all over the place. If you feel confident in the property you bought, you just need to revisit the reasons that brought you to put in an offer.
3. MOVING IN  It is exciting to move in, but over the first few months you will notice things that you did not see before. Maybe a noisy neighbour or there are more repairs required on the house that could not have been anticipated. You will wonder if you made a mistake. You may feel weird in an unfamiliar neighbourhood where friends or family are not as geographically close as they used to be. Still, it will also feel good to make your mark on the new home. You will likely do things to make this strange place your own.
4. YEAR ONE  I find after a full year, with most people, the house-proud feelings really start to kicks in. You now know your neighbourhood, and you’ve made new friends here or your old friends and family still come to visit. You take pride in where you live. You feel comfortable there. You feel good that you are paying a mortgage and not rent.
5. YEAR FIVE TO TEN Most of the emotion has warn off by then. Emotions will obsess where they feel most at home: in your relationships, jobs, and life’s adventures. You will be more house-proud because a healthy chunk of your mortgage has been paid off. It’s not something you think about often, but when reminded, you take pride.

Of course the emotions of real estate are also the terrain of sellers, 2nd or 3rd or 4th time buyers, and investors. And for these folks, I think the basics are the same. Emotion will take hold. And like first time buyers, you don’t need to know why it is there, but you just have to acknowledge that it is there. And it should be! Emotion is trying to guide you. At the very least, it’s screaming loud enough so you notice it’s there. You just need to know when and how to take emotion’s advice.